bangsandwhimpers

bangsandwhimpers

Welcome to you , dearest reader

You have stumbled upon an almanac encompassing incredible, hilarious and dreadful dalliances spanning ten years and counting

Some are bangs, some are just whimpers: it’s all here in probably way too much detail

Pull up your chaise longue, extend your legs, take off your pants and mix a drink of your choice

cumming next on

bangs and whimpers

  • The Accountant

    He’s been pursuing me for about six months. One of the last from the swingers site I gave my number to. And dear reader, I have been putting him off. I’ve given him every excuse under the sun: a new… more ›

  • The Electrician – again

    It’s been a while but he’s been messaging me fairly regularly for a meet. Less than 24 hours since I met you-know-who but given I didn’t get much action, I’m game. I guess I can’t be in love then. He’s… more ›

  • Playing House

    I’ve finally pinned him down to see me. He’s in a very complicated situation involving  a nuisance neighbour and I don’t realise the enormity of the situation until I’m there and see the riot vans and the armed police. As… more ›

  • The Teacher

    He’s French, which is a surprise. I can’t quite place the accent at first but as he explains he’s from a small town near Bordeaux it unfurls from aural hieroglyphics into a recognisable Gallic twang. One of our favourite all… more ›

  • Sunday

    I haven’t seen him in around six weeks which for me may as well be six years. It’s a date of sorts because I am nervous and have been agonising over it all day. I’m even worrying what to wear… more ›

  • The Michelin star chef

    I can’t read him at all when I meet him: he’s quiet, polite and possibly not an axe murderer. He offers me a drink as soon as I get there and we do the chit chat you do when you… more ›

  • Acorn

    It’s rained all day. He’s grumpy. I’m grumpy. It’s my first day in a new job. I’m late arriving at his because my boss wanted to take me to the pub. We get back to his after buying some small… more ›

  • The One?

    I haven’t seen him in over a year. I had to wean myself off him, delete his number – you know the drill – dear reader you were there. But when I do a random search of his old username… more ›

  • The Electrician

    He’s not my usual type but he’s made me laugh on messages and he’s available during the day which is what I need right now. We meet in the designated coffee shop which he struggles to find. Very quickly we… more ›

  • The Copier Repairman

    It’s less than 24 hours since the last fuck but I still need some more good hard dick. This guy is at least in the area and I’m working from home. No-one will notice I’m not online for half an… more ›