bangsandwhimpers

bangsandwhimpers

Welcome to you , dearest reader

You have stumbled upon an almanac encompassing incredible, hilarious and dreadful dalliances spanning ten years and counting

Some are bangs, some are just whimpers: it’s all here in probably way too much detail

Pull up your chaise longue, extend your legs, take off your pants and mix a drink of your choice

cumming next on

bangs and whimpers

  • The Record Label Guy…again

    Oh this is a mistake. In my sexnotes, it even says “never again” But he’s popped up as a suggested friend in my Instagram, and i send a follow request – what do I have to lose? Well, I bottle… more ›

  • The builder

    It is one of the hottest days of the year and I notice the burger first, the way he is holding it. probably a Big Mac although I’ve never had one. we are on a train platform and it looks… more ›

  • Begin again

    I am breaking my celibacy, a long year and a bit without anything, no sexual contact. It should feel less like a chore than it does now I know he’s definitely coming over. But the familiar habit of dressing up… more ›

  • Breast

    I go for a screening, this time in a mobile unit in a car park. It is almost laughable except it isn’t. I am early because there is no waiting room, no screen, no loo to visit first. I open… more ›

  • The Italian

    The photos are unmistakably me; completely naked. I’m on my bed: the covers familiar, the artwork in the background. Definitely my bedroom. One of me from the side: hair tied up, hands covering my face. And then three more explicit… more ›

  • On Celibacy

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  • The virtual sub

    He’s got a fairly vanilla profile on the site, but his persistence pays off and despite thinking I’m more interested in another guy that week, he wins me over somehow. Oh yeah, the original guy disappeared. His politeness and keenness… more ›

  • The suck

    One of his kinks is wanting me to breastfeed him; I’m on holiday when this revelation appears and on the beach I sit and fantasise about it. My knickers are soaked and I’m shocked at how wet I’ve got. A… more ›

  • The lunch hour

    I’m at work, and it’s a packed, stressful, meeting heavy day. I already feel overwhelmed. But underneath my rather professional black Cos dress I am wearing a red bordello bra and matching thong. Tights, because who can wear suspenders outside… more ›

  • The accountant

    We’ve been chatting for a month but haven’t met yet because both of us have holidays. It’s frustrating but we keep up the momentum. He’s from a site let’s call young men depot. My expectations are ground level, possibly basement.… more ›