bangsandwhimpers

bangsandwhimpers

Welcome to you , dearest reader

You have stumbled upon an almanac encompassing incredible, hilarious and dreadful dalliances spanning ten years and counting

Some are bangs, some are just whimpers: it’s all here in probably way too much detail

Pull up your chaise longue, extend your legs, take off your pants and mix a drink of your choice

cumming next on

bangs and whimpers

  • The Civil Servant: Part Four

    No. I wasn’t sure there would be a part four either. But I’m glad there was. He brought chocolates. We drank wine. We talked for hours about politics, education, science, maths and further maths. Hell, I even showed him the… more ›

  • Three Men: Three Eulogies

    He used to text me. He’d ask if I was free that day, never any more notice than that. Now he doesn’t. I still message him of course, he still replies. He’s never available. It’s not the same, something has… more ›

  • Please don’t stop the music

    This is another post for @sexblogofsorts Non Clickbait competition Music and sex are inextricably linked. Some would argue you can’t have one without the other. On one memorable, and shameful occasion I ended up fucking to the Kaiser Chiefs. Not… more ›

  • Kissing with confidence

    This is our entry for @sexblogofsorts ‘s competition: Don’t read clickbait, read this: **The Competition** http://youtu.be/kXBLJ6JHdFM This song came out in the early 80’s, before I’d kissed anyone. In it, Will Powers sings about the importance of not ruining a… more ›

  • The Civil Servant – Part Three

    He climbed into bed with me. I couldn’t stop giggling. “What are you laughing at? Is it me?” I assured him it wasn’t. We chatted for a bit. Normally I hate the inbetween-sex chat, but this was different. He was… more ›

  • The Civil Servant – Part Two

    I rode his face, unable to keep still. His beard tickled me, his tongue danced over my clit then flicked in and out of my cunt. He grabbed my arse cheeks and controlled my movements ever so slightly. It was… more ›

  • The Civil Servant – Part One

    The package arrived on a Monday morning, I couldn’t get it open quick enough. The pictures on the box made me laugh, I wondered who’d had to design it. They hadn’t done a very good job. The harness was just… more ›

  • Locker room

    It is a marvellous place, a voyeurs’ paradise. Here women transform from sweaty sticky messes to sleek and sophisticated with a flourish of the straighteners and a slick of eye liner. All body types are covered: the tall, boyishly framed… more ›

  • The fashion designer

    He was late. But he’d apologised already – train were delayed. We were on a time limit – half an hour. I was as hungover as fuck, I nearly hadn’t bothered. My curiosity got the better of me. He arrived,… more ›

  • That guy

    It was our second date. The first was a lunch, and I was on a lunch hour so it didn’t really count. I wasn’t sure about him – he seemed far too keen. We’d said goodbye and he’d gone for… more ›