I have been here before many times but never wearing this bathing suit or feeling this horny. It takes me a while to realise that nobody can see if I just slip the crotch of the suit to the side and thrum my clit, as if the surging bubbles underneath weren’t enough already.

I smile as I cast my mind back to four year old me, sent out of the classroom for doing exactly this, the teacher clearly clueless as this meant I was alone and could do it to my hearts content. I wonder what conversation – if any – took place with my parents ? Have I always been a horny little bitch?

My go to feeling after wanking is usually guilt, which can sometimes be even more of a turn on. If I continue to play in this pool – could I come ? Dare I? I look over at the woman opposite me buffering herself spreadeagled on the jets, hands gripping the sides, foot sturdily resting against the ladder. Her tits are bobbing out of her bikini and on the water jets. It is hot.

I had a chance to fuck the guy three days ago but circumstances didn’t quite come together and we didn’t meet. But we had phone sex which I don’t like but will entertain if I’m horny too. we have discussed many different fantasies, he has sent me links to his go to- porn which is fascinating and some links to sex outfits, one of which I have just bought but not told him.

I stopped watching porn a while back but then realised I could use a VPN rather than age verification which was fruitful. My usual search terms were revisited :

Latex porn

Fake taxi

Rachel Dogging

Gangbang

Gay cowboy ranch

I made myself cut back as I felt guilty. My libido had disappeared- celibate or not I just wasn’t spending any effort on it. But oh boy is it back now!

His links were all “slut” based : women in a variety of outfits and situations getting fucked by multiple guys. His favourite was surprising – a well dressed fake couple kissing in front of a room of masked men wanking and another female servicing just them. I liked the slowness of it, the build up and in some weird way the civility of it – here was a guy respecting the women he’s fucking.

Essentially by the end of the month I need to be fucked.